ขอคนใจดีตรวจแกรมม่านิยายภาษาอังกฤษให้หน่อยนะ #english #grammar

     This is a real story of myself. My name is Anna. I have a best freiend, Jane. We have been friend since childhood. It started when I 'm in love with a guy. His name is Dell. I met him when i was in high school. It was a love at first sight. I couldn't take my eyes off him and tell anyone even Jane.
     Two years later was my first time for study in university. It was surprised because we learned in the same program with Dell. Then we had talked to him more than ever before. But I must kept my felling in secret because I thought they love each other. This was the only way that i can do.

Boy's part:

     Jane,Anna and me. We were friends. We were getting more closer each other when we leaned in the same progarm. พวกเรามีกันและกัน until Jane confessed her love for me. But I didn't think of her as more than a friend. I had been loving Anna. After that I decide to tell Anna that I fell in love with her for along time but she didn't say anything. Her face look frightened. In the meantime I was crach by the car when I was running out of there.
     After that I woke up in hospital. Everyone thought I was Amnesia. Anna,too. She came to visit me and her eyes seem depressed. She could be sorry for this even. But in fact I didn't Amnesia. That was my fault. I couldn't accept thr truth that she didn't love me. I was afraid of losing. I didn't want to lose her. Although my heart was painful but at least, we were still friend. If that situation didn't happen. She won't be come back to me again.

อันนี้แต่งเองค่ะ
อยากทราบว่าพออ่านกันไปแล้ว รู้เรื่องบ้างไหมค่ะ ว่าใคร ทำอะไร
คือต้นฉบับ(อันนี้ฉบับแก้ไข้เนื้อเรื่องอีกครั้ง) ให้เพื่อนอ่านแล้วเพื่อนบอกว่ามันเป็นเรื่องความรักของเบี้ยน -.,- ) เลยเอามาให้อ่านคอมเม้นกันว่า อ่านได้เรื่องกันว่าอย่างไรบ้างค่ะ แล้วแกรมม่านี่น่าเกลียดมากหรือปล่าว ?!